26/08/2002 - Entry #26
...and it came to pass, that the concept of Funkatisation was declared a Universal Law by Mother Nature, and therefore exempt from control by the Forces of Good, and those of Evil. Full and forceful uponst man it was, Eternal Funk was nastily maintained to endure the skillions of Time. The Gods scoped the situation and proclaimed, "All is Cool." But! All was not Cool throughout the Cosmos. The dynamics of Order & Equilibrium was being waylaid by new manners of triffidistic jivation fermenting on pagan planet Earth. A former vanguard land of liberty and freedom turned bogardistic, and the star-spangled Kong of Babylon was unleashed to bully titbit morsels of faraway lands. And one dawn's light brought the greedy presence forth, to confront another, the Commie Crudzilla.
And Kong did indeed, fervently eye Crudzilla's new prize (a minute, Far Eastern land) and spake, "Gimme some of that, Gibbs!" The Red Beast stirred with Fangs bared, "Be off, yellow running dog, imperialistic scum!" Fazed not, Kong went before the people of this land...armed with a false rap of salvation. But, they...being extremely hip to the Game...answered with, "No good, Number 10 - Let's Take It To The Stage!"
Kong, angered and pissed...sent forth armoured goons, accompanied by outstanding nasties as: Doctor Napalm, Professor Claymore and Reverend No-Grow. Against these odds, the black pajama mojo men arose from the people's hearts...and countervamped with hellhonnik fury! As it was, victory was the ultimate, but bitter triumph for the little people who sent the mammoth Kong back homeward reeling and smoking into worldwide breakface!
And verily as I rap unto you from the real side of life, there was a young mortal named Ali, who was indeed the greatest - whupping heads between signifying. But, it came to pass that the law of the land did declare that he would be obligated to exterminate strangers in an unknown land. Ali refused to participate in the wrongful bloodlusts, and he was punished and lost his boxing title, from the serpentile representatives of so-called judiciary righteousiousness...
With the passage of time, the war became no longer fun, and the games were indeed reduced to a lesser level. Ali was without his crown of glory, but knew what time it was - "Let's Take It To The Stage!" He then proceeded to rend asunder numerous lightweights, whiteweights, dumbweights and deadweights - and recaptured his glory! Justice prevails!
And now, nebulous and negroid nastificators lurk about within the realm of Funkadelia! Yes - certain goldplated warmongers are indeed - paranoid about their lesser brothers "Blowing Them Off The Stage!" Behindst the scenes, turbulent conflicts hath arisen; various Lands going heads-up over the issue of 'you-go-first'-isms. Yes, under the very noses of their fans, these envious, blahflammative, dufus reactionary buffoons bicker, blabber and stew over such frivilous issues.
Tempers hath flared at the bitter end of coin tosses and music equipment has been known to be mysteriously sabotaged in vengeance...or concert time bogarded away. Other acts have been committed and some are too despicable for mortal ears.
BUT - LET IT BE KNOWN: FUNKADELIC DON'T PLAY THAT! Uponst the madness of the world, Funkadelic prevails as the phallic berserker of Hope. Yes! Battered and blammed by broxinated vapours of cancerous, riff-raff knuckleheadology, mopod molecule molesters, and spastic, phobic VUZ pegs of pulchritudinous jealousy...Funkadelic continues to rout such nitrod charlatans with powerdrive over-bites. Funkadelic do not bullshit the masses, because they are almighteous and the baddest thang happening within this entire dimensional plane! Death on jivation, Funkadelic is! As the mighteous live band in the known universe, let it be known that Funkadelic will play before any "name-brand" yokels, and verily - force-field them into scoured crawfish milk! "Let's Take It To The Stage!" Funkadelia shall triumph! Let's Take It To The Stage, mollyflocks!
--- Might be busy until Thursday. Mychal (my boss) has called for a meeting on Thursday night, and wants to know what everyone has been doing for the last two weeks. Since my answer right now would be "Sleeping and scratching myself," I'm gonna try and get some solid work done before then. Which means this might not be updated for a few days. Sorry, but I think I'll be pretty busy. What with sleeping and scratching myself.
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