07/09/2002 - Entry #30
So last night was very drunken. We went out to possibly the worst club in the world, quite frankly. Heaven & Hell. Top floor is all trancey (as Heaven must assuredly be), the bottom floor is a little harder (as you'd expect Hell to be), and the middle floor is Purgatory. No, literally.
Sadly we weren't really capable of enjoying the night, even if it hadn't been such a shit club, because we were absolutely fucking cunted. We started playing drinking games at about 8 o'clock, and it was all downhill from there. In the tradition of these things, we played Twenty-one first, until we couldn't play it any more. For those who don't know the rules of Twenty-one, they go like this: The first person picks a direction (left or right), and starts with 1. The person next to them has to continue with 2, and it continues round the table like that. Pretty simple, right? But unfortunately, it gets more complicated. If someone says two numbers instead of one (i.e. "Three four"), then it reverses the direction of play. If they say three numbers, then it skips the next person in the sequence. If you get your turn wrong, by either taking too long to realise you're up, or you say the wrong number, or mistakenly think it's your turn, then you have to drink a couple of fingers of your drink. Also, whoever says 21 has to drink, and then the game starts over again. Sadly, it's more complicated than that, too. Whoever ends up on 21, once they've drunk their drink, gets to introduce a new rule of their choice to the game. This rule can be anything, from, say, "Instead of saying 'eight', you have to say a breed of animal" to "Twelve and thirteen are reversed. So now it goes ten, eleven, thirteen, twelve, fourteen, fifteen." Believe me, it gets confusing. Dave decided it'd be a really fucking good idea to introduce the rule "Any number which is a factor of 5 reverses the direction and skips two players." After that caused chaos, we decided to call it quits and move onto the next game. Which was my favourite, the celebrity game. Rules are very simple. The starting person names a celebrity, and the next person over has to name another celebrity whose name begins with the first letter of that celebritie's surname. So "Marlon Brando" would mean the next person had to think of a celebrity whose name begins with B. It's not difficult. But, if both the celebrity's Christian and Surname begin with the same letter, then the direction reverses, and goes round the other way. Obviously since this is a drinking game, you have to continuously drink while you think of a celebrity. As soon as it's your turn, you have to start drinking, and you're not allowed to stop until you've thought of a celebrity. Typical conversation would go like this:
"Marlon Brando"
"Benny Hill"
*glug* *glug* "Hilary Swank!"
*glug* "Sylvester Stallone"
"Fuck!" *glug* *glug* "Sharon Stone! ha!"
"Good answer." *glug* "Sammy Davis Junior"
"Is that a D or a J?"
"D. Drink, you bastard"
*glug* *glug* "Darren Day!"
"Wanking hell" *glug* *glug* "David Duchovny"
"Pissflaps!" *glug* *glug* "David Frost"
*glug* "Frank Lampard"
"Liam Neeson"
*glug* "Nigella Lawson"
*glug* "Lee Bowyer"
"Billy Brag"
"Fuck." *glug* "Bobby Ball"
"Nice" *glug* *glug* "Billy Bremner"
"Good answer" *glug* "Bobby Bowry. Plays for Colchester United"
"Fair enough" *glug* *glug* "Brian Blessed"
"Shit!" *glug* *glug* "Bryan Brown"
"This is getting silly" *glug* *glug* *glug* "Brenda Blethyn"
*glug* *glug* *glug* *glug* "I've run out of drink"
"Right. New game. Pints all round"
It was fun. But messy. Very very messy. We drank too much, too fast. I just don't remember the latter half of the night. It's all a blur to me. I sincerely apologise to anyone that I spoke to last night. I can't be held responsible for anything I said, and knowing me I probably said some silly things. So I'm sorry. Wholeheartedly. For whatever I said.
Please sign the Guestbook. For the love of God, sign it now.