16/11/2002 - Entry #40
So with the Republicans in control of the Senate and the House of Representatives, it seems that war against Iraq is pretty much a foregone conclusion. I'm sure I don't need to tell you what that means. That's right, it's time to play 'Guess The Brand Name!'
With each new war comes a new brand name. Marketing a war is serious business, and no product needs a catchier title than a war which expends vast quantities of resources and intentionally kills large numbers of people!
This very American trend of euphemistic fog covering such enterprises has been going for decades, and has firmly established a place in our hearts, much like the Easter Bunny, Noel Edmonds, and the word "rom-com." These are things to look forward to with glee and anticipation. Everybody knows there's no such thing as a Ministry of War anymore. Such a body implies barbarism and violence. Nowadays we call it "Defence," with the aura of inherent justification that befits their activities. As the two avenues, Pennsylvania and Madison, further intersect we can look forward to many more quirky phrases.
Of course, none will ever beat the true majesty of the first Bush administration's name for the invasion of Panama in 1989, which went forward under the title "Operation Just Cause." Why, if that doesn't just tickle you pink, I don't know what will! Linguists refer to it as "choosing operation names that were calculated to shape political perceptions." Lots of news journalists picked up on the phrase "Just Cause," and this led the Bush and Clinton administrations to continue using such wonderfully tendentious names.
It's no accident that the new style of branding was introduced at around the same time the cable news shows started to label their coverage of major stories with catchy names and logos. I still remember catching an advertisement for CNN's coverage of the Sierra Leone incident a few years ago. "CRY FREETOWN!" chimed the disembodied voice. It took me a minute or two to realise that it wasn't a film. I half expected the coverage to star Tom Hanks in the leading role, and Claire Forlani as his love interest.
Operation Desert Storm is another of my favourites, simply because it conjurs images of an act of nature, rather than the military. One could say, an act of God. Ha. Dick Cheney and Norman Schwarzkopf assisting in the implementation of divine natural occurrences; high winds and 2,000-pound laser-guided bombs raining down from the heavens. You have to love these euphemisms.
Soon after the Gulf War Desert Storm, Major General Charles McClain commented: "The perception of an operation can be as important to success as the execution of the operation itself." Very true, and when 'guiding' the public's perception, there's nothing better than a salutory label that sticks. In October of last year, while engaging Afghanistan, the Bush team came up with Operation Infinite Justice (or "Operation Bomb All Islamics" as Chris Morris and Armando Iannucci called it), but changed it to Operation Enduring Freedom, which was much better received by the US media.
If you think I'm wrong in saying that the Executive Branch is run by people who plan US military actions while thinking like marketers, you're a tad naive. It was a beautiful slip of the tongue when the White House Chief of Staff, Andrew Card, told the New York Times: "From a marketing point of view, you don't introduce new products in August." Hehe. Priceless. It was made all the better due to the fact that, not coincidentally, the main roll-out of new-and-improved rationales for an upcoming war on Iraq didn't take place until September. Beautiful!
None of this is anti-war liberalism, by the way. Just part of my ongoing introverted war with the media and their marketing spin. But either way nothing will change, and long before the war is over we'll all know its reassuring codename. Feel free to place your bets on it now, and we'll see who came closest. War can be fun! I'm going with "Operation Paroxysmal Liberty."
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