6/02/2003 - Entry #67
Okay, just a quick question. Has anyone seen any news coverage of the review of American media ownership rules currently going on? The FCC is considering repealing or altering a number of key rules that limit media consolidation, but I can only find one mention of it in the mainstream news (ABC's World News This Morning). Is that kinda suspect, or am I finding unscrupulousness where there is no unscrupulousness? I mean, the media companies do stand to gain quite a lot from the relaxation of ownership caps. The FCC (won't let me be) is poised to roll back regulations that currently prevent networks from buying their independently owned affiliates, and may allow one major network to buy another, as well as repeal the rules that keep the newspaper business separate from TV industry. It obviously doesn't really affect me as much as it does the Americans, but I do spend a fair amount of time reading Yank news, and the idea of media conglomerates further monopolising mainstream journalism seems a bit unappealing. Has anyone else seen any mention of it in the news? I'm intrigued.
I can't think of anything else to say, so, yet again, some frankly hi-larious football quotes for you. Ever get the feeling I resort to the goldmine of football whenever I'm struggling for topics? No? Good.
"I would like to be a woman, though I don't know why." - Auxerre striker Djibril Cisse, who says one of his most prized possessions is a dress designed by Jean-Paul Gaultier.
"I thought it was a wrapped-up barbeque chicken thing so tried it and it was quite nice but there were too many bones in it for me and then I seen the wing of it and I asked Tony and it was a bat and I was all 'Howay man!'" - Paul Gascoigne becomes the epitome of Englishmen abroad after signing for his new club in China.
"The brain is like a muscle and if you don't use it, it starts to slow down." - Sol Campbell, mainstay of the the Arsenal defence and indeed of my quotes sections, combines philosophy with biology.
"Robbie Fowler is happy where he is. As far as he's concerned he's a Leeds United player and he has still got three-and-a-half years to run on his contract." - Robbie Fowler's agent, George Scott, who was surely the only football agent to decide the reopening of the transfer window was the ideal time to go on holiday to the Canary Islands. Nice work, George.
"Obviously it was very disappointing to miss out on Robbie Fowler. The saga is history now." - Kevin Keegan, on Wednesday night, confirms that Robbie Fowler absolutely definitely isn't signing for Manchester City. It's history. Water under the bridge. Spilt milk. Gotta look forward. Can't dwell on the past.
"He’s a deep thinker." - Kevin Keegan again, this time explaining why Robbie Fowler signed for Manchester City early Thursday morning.
"This parody of Beckham as a Christ figure is amusing as a lot of people really do treat him like a god. But it is a lousy painting and faintly sacrilegious." - Art critic David Lee on a painting of David Beckham being crucified, which is on display in the London Art Gallery. You can see the painting right here. Y'know, he's not wrong. Good call, Mr. Lee.
"I see David Beckham as a modern day religious icon - a person who appears as a god." - Sharon Lutchman, creator of the aforementioned painting.
"What could have been a title decider was no longer a title decider. Not winning at Arsenal has cost us. It has made a big difference because I felt we turned the corner that day, and those two lost points could make a real difference in our season. I still maintain we should have won there." - Gerrard Houllier blames Arsenal, and Francis Jeffers in particular, guilty of killing Liverpool's bid for the title. If only it were possible to win the title in November, he'd have an excellent point. Unfortunately, you have to, y'know, keep on winning for the rest of the year in order to be the champion. Stupid rule, I know, but there you go.
"A few weeks ago I don't think we would have been able to come back twice against a team like Arsenal. We showed great character and commitment and I know now that we have turned the corner." - Gerrard Houllier predicts that Liverpool will bounce back from their streak of bad results and take the footballing world by storm. The famous corner has well and truly been turned.
"We do like to go out and win football matches. That’s always our objective." - Trevor Francis reveals the secret for success. Sarcasm aside, it seems to have worked, given the fact that his team, Crystal Palace, beat Liverpool 2-0 last night, sending them crashing out of the FA Cup. Maybe Gerrard Houllier should take a leaf out of his book, instead of going on about turning corners all the time, since they've clearly turned nothing. (Sorry, Mal. I don't mean to rub it in).
"And this season I think they were at times very lucky." - Aww, yeah, there you go. When all else fails, accuse the other team of blind luck! That's the spirit! You're truly my hero, Gerrard Houllier. Genuinely. Just when you think he's really lost the plot, he redeems himself with a fantastic quote like that. Because, no, seriously, how lucky have Arsenal really been this year? They're the jammiest team in the world, surely. How lucky do you have to be to slowly build up one of the best squads in the history of football, with incredible depth and versatility, not to mention talent, and then keep that team together with incredible morale and desire to win? Man, talk about lucky!
"He has in the foot the remote control." - Hooray for Claudio Raneiri, for showing us why we like foreign managers.
"We combat until the end. It's important our mental strength. Together with all our hearts." - Claudio again. What a legend.
"Scheidt Is Squeezed Out" - The Sun, with the worst headline ever after Rafael Scheidt is forced out of the Celtic squad.
Alan Brazil: "Do you know if Hansie Cronje is doing any media work during the Cricket World Cup?"
Cricket Pundit: (After a lengthy stunned silence) "Well, that’d be a bit hard from beyond the grave, mate."
Alan Brazil somehow manages to beat his John Thaw gaffe. How does he do it?
"There is no way I can consider him for the Manchester United game. He will come back talking Chinese." - Arsene Wenger reveals the frightening implications of spending three days in a foreign country. Bizarre xenophobia? From a Frenchman? Whatever next.
"I'm not a racist, I'm just very black and white" - Speaking of xenophobia, Jonathan Woodgate provides us with the most ill-conceived quote of the week.
"I've known Kieron Dyer, Andy Griffin, Alan Shearer and Gary Speed for a few years, so hopefully I'll settle in well." - Jonathan Woodgate.
"I've never met Jonathan but I'm delighted that he's come to Newcastle." - Woodgate's best mate, Gary Speed.
"I don’t know if you know the fox but sometimes he gives things away, too. We have an unselfish fox. The most important quality to play in a big team is intelligence and he has shown he has it. He is a good fox." - Arsene Wenger. Gotta love these foreign managers. How has Europe survived so long with so many lunatics in charge?
"There was a lot of speculation in the summer about me moving to Leeds. With the Leeds situation being what it is at the moment, it wouldn't have been the best place to have gone to. I'm pleased I didn't go." - Darren Anderton manages to reassure all Leeds fans that it could have been so much worse, whilst simultaneously making us hate him even more. Not bad.
"Well, it’s unbelievable. What a poxy goal to concede. An unbelievably crap shot from Mark Fish." - Chris Kamara once again proves he's the greatest commentator ever. Unbelievable.
"His dream come true was to play for Sunderland, it was the stuff of Roy of the Rovers." - Howard Wilkinson on Michael Proctor who, in Roy of the Rovers fashion, scored two of the three own goals at the weekend, inside of eight minutes.
"I was angry that Ronny Johnsen tried to get our young defender James McEveley sent off. I thought he was a proper player but now he’s just another Jonny Foreigner, like so many of them." - Graeme Souness. Rarrr. Go on, Graeme.
"Apart from my contribution to the game, I seem to have reunited the fans and the team. West Ham were lacking a spark to set them alight. Putting modesty to one side, I think I lit the fuse for them." - Paulo di Canio provides the Italian braggadocio side of this racial stereotype extravaganza.
Ah, that's enough of that.
Hehehe. Sorry to make light-hearted gags out of a 'tragedy', but look at this. "Shuttle travelling nearly 18 times the speed of light" huh? Crikey that's fast. That's, what, just over 120 billion miles per hour? 3.3 million miles per second? No wonder they crashed! Sheesh. That's just reckless driving, that is! I love CNN.
Also, this is just about the coolest thing ever. I totally want one.
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